Purgatory

Actually.

Purgatory acknowledges basic goodness.

You aren’t going to hell.

But you’re not quite ready for heaven.

You’re good.

But not quite good enough.

Purgatory.

P1030013

So anyway and everything.

I played the violin from the age of 9 to 19.

My early years of purgatory.

Orchestra after orchestra. Recital upon recital.

I suffered. I was good. But never quite good enough.

My bow was up when it should have been down.

Violin purgatory.

Meant that I wasn’t good enough.

Not just my violin playing.

But me.

I thought I wasn’t worthy.

Because my bow was up when it should have been down.

And I’ve lived with that decade after decade.

My violin secure in its case/coffin?

And me in Purgatory.

Finally and now.

I understand.

The human imagination.

Can create heaven and hell.

Good and not good enough.

Purgatory.

So if we can create purgatory from our imagination.

Can’t we create heaven?

Can’t we be good enough?

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s